More than you ever wanted to know about impaling
Day 23, Friday, June 22
Dracula’s Castle, or, more accurately, the castle his grandfather once owned and where he was imprisoned for six months. It’s high on a steep hill, but not much to look at; the stairwells were narrow and the crowd of tourists voluminous – and that’s before the busses arrive from Bucharest. Anyone who’s seen a castle knows that the interior consists of little rooms and old furniture, most of it heavy and dark. One doesn’t marvel at the artistry so much as one wonders how they got it up those narrow stairs. There are nice views of the forested countryside. The room where Vlad was “imprisoned” was of average size and, of course, contained nothing from the period of his life. Informational posters addressed various parts of his legend and military career, one distinguished by slaughter and success.
He learned about impaling while he and his brother, Radu the Handsome, were imprisoned by the Turks, who had perfected a way of impaling from the anus upward that didn’t kill the victim right away. Sweet guys. You’d think impaling was done with a sharp stake, but, in order to keep the victims alive as long as possible, a rounded stake was used. Vlad added his own touches, displaying the captured and impaled victims in an open place where approaching (typically Turkish) soldiers could see them and contemplate their fate if they were captured. The lowest-ranking men were arrayed on a lower level than the higher-ranking ones, mimicking a ghastly chain of command. Instead of letting the victims starve as the Turks did, Vlad fed his to prolong their suffering. Birds would peck out the eyes and, eventually consume their genitals. Not good. For Moslem troops, who believed that dying for Allah meant a one way trip to paradise and the affections of multiple beautiful virgins, loss of eyes and man equipment kind of diminished the fun of the enterprise. At least one would assume so, and it is reported that some Turkish troops refused to fight Vlad’s armies. As was noted in previous Dracula-related comments, the Turks really didn’t like Vlad.
For those who can’t get enough impaling trivia, the way to keep the victim alive is to slant the stake so that it emerges near the shoulder. It’s all in the technique.
Last impaling story: Vlad was a Romanian Orthodox believer, who had a German – and therefore Protestant – mistress. Oddly enough, the Germans didn’t like Vlad much either so, when a false report claimed that he’d died, a posse of German women seized the unfortunate maiden and cut off her hair, a traditional punishment for prostitutes. Bad mistake. Vlad returns to town, became miffed and had 100 German women impaled. Not a guy to mess with.
The curious reader of this journal may wonder: What about all that famously delicious Romanian food? Uh, if you like breaded meat with fried potatoes, Romania is your kind of place. Having been driven off meat by Serbian cuisine, we are in a No Man’s Land of bland pasta and salad dishes. Not awful, but a smidge low on flavor. Our meat-eating compatriots aren’t doing much better: it’s international tourist cuisine with almost no spice or local characteristics or idiosyncrasies. After the “…picked up a tray and found a career” guy, we’ve had a string of servers who either lied or rolled their eyes at the prospect of doing their jobs. As Radu repeats, tourism isn’t big business here. It shows. Most of the folks elbowing up the stairs at Dracula’s castle are Romanian. Or Japanese. (Our group has none of either; eight from Guam, though, a gaggle who take the same picture of each and every one of their number at each and every stop. Wanna see the world? It’s in the extreme background of their photos.)
On the other hand, the tchotchke slums outside the castle are more extensive – and with better t-shirts - than any of the others. Better still, there’s a guy selling kurtos kalacs, a treat made of thin dough wrapped around a foot long funnel, then baked and flavored with cinnamon, coconut, etc. You tear it apart with your fingers so it’s a natural for sharing (not that either of us wanted to). It set us back $3, our only regret being we didn’t buy two. Like the Salad Box franchise idea, this is a can’t-miss business opportunity for those smart enough to get in on the ground floor. Contact Dave with your non-refundable $100,000 deposits today. Sure, he’ll deduct small administrative and finders fees, but think of the potential!
A drive to Sinaia, a place named after a monastery founded by monks from Sinai (between Egypt and Israel) . This is also site of the summer palace built (in only 6 years!) For King Carol, circa 1890. Other European kings having hogged all of the design options, Carol went for an all-wood structure. He got Thomas Edison to electrify the place so fire was semi-eliminated as a risk issue. Edison also provided a new gadget: a motion picture projector for an in-house movie theater. The interiors are crowded with gorgeous, never-to-be-duplicated wooden sculptures, parquet floors, etc, etc. For certain rooms, such as the “French” or “Italian” themed ones, the royals hired two young painters to reproduce old masters from the various countries; these were Gustav Klimt and his brother (who allegedly had more talent, but who soon died).
Carol also died eventually, leaving Queen Marie on the throne. She had five children, three of whom do not seem to have been Carol’s. Later in life, Marie converted the Baha’i religion, which irked the Orthodox Church. It also resulted in some Baha'i symbols being added to the exterior of the chapel built next to the Sinaia Monastery. We visit both and listen in as Orthodox monks sing part of the liturgy. A bit like the Gregorian Chants that were once briefly popular in the U.S. Very soothing.
Then the slog to Bucharest during rush hour on a Friday night. Hmm. Might be traffic.
A few photos of the day:
A few photos of the day:
And, how about a Google photo album. Hope to add captions later: There are several early photos of the narrowest street in Europe. Yes, some graffiti.....
Link:
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